When our mind is calm, we’re better able to find peace of mind and live a joyful life. – Dalai Lama
Your mind is racing. It’s driving you crazy. It’s not quieting down and you can’t relax.
Anxiety leads to overthinking and overthinking leads to anxiety.
How can you get out of this vicious cycle?
There are more ways to help you get unstuck and move forward.
Here are 10 ultimate ways to have a calm and peaceful mind.
Having a peaceful mind means cultivating the ability to be at ease with your situation.
10 Ultimate Ways to Have a Calm and Peaceful Mind
1. Allow people to own up to their own baggage
Someone points you the finger and you think to yourself, “What did I do to deserve this?”
Is it something that I did? Is something wrong with me?
The things others do we believe is our fault.
The thing is: we take too much ownership to what is outside of our control.
But really, we have no control to the reactions of others.
Their behavior has nothing to do with you (unless you actively push them).
Instead, let go that you have control of the situation.
Release your control of other’s behavior.
Allow others to own their own negativity, personal problems, and baggage.
When you allow others to own up to their negativity, personal problems, and baggage, you are liberated and free from affecting you.
You are free from attaching their vibrations onto your own.
Sometimes we are hard on ourselves and tend to forgive others easily.
This time, the forgiveness and flexibility we give to other people we can also give to ourselves.
So forgive yourself and let go.
Then our mind is no longer anxious and is free to let others be themselves.
2. Give yourself permission to make mistakes
When we think we have to make something perfect, we cannot be calm.
Because one small mistake will cost the entire perfection we dream to have!
The problem with perfection is that it doesn’t exist, yet, we seek it in ourselves and in others.
When we don’t have that perfection, we beat ourselves up.
When we see others not as perfect as we hope they would be, we become frustrated.
Being perfect is the opposite of being human. And by definition, being humans mean we are not perfect.
You don’t have to be perfect. Let go of the concept of perfection.
Instead, think to yourself that you are a ‘work in progress‘ because you are always improving every day.
You are always learning and changing every day.
Let go of the illusion of perfection, of too high a standard, and do what you can today.
When you do, your mind will be able to relax and take you higher than you will ever expect.
3. Know that you are not determined by external factors but by your ability to face difficult times
There’s a lot of stress in your life.
And your mindset plays a huge factor in how you handle that stress.
It can either turn you into a depressed little duckling or an unphased and peaceful mind.
If you believe that you are dictated by external factors, that your life is determined by things outside of you, then you will never have peace of mind.
But if you know that difficult times will happen in your life, you will be ready to face them.
When you feel that you can face difficult times, no matter what it may be, your mind is at peace.
Accept that life doesn’t have to be all rainbows and butterflies. It can be downright stressful.
But the difference between an anxious and a peaceful mind is knowing that you have the ability to face stressful situations and still appreciate life.
Meditation prepares the mind for peace.
- It makes you mentally strong so we can face any situation with ease.
- It increases emotional resilience.
- It reduces the tendency to react and allows you to respond to situations.
- It relieves stress and anxiety
- It observes the chaotic thoughts and help you choose your thoughts better.
With meditation, you clear your mind of clouded stress and gives you confidence for a more calm mind.
5. Practice Patience
Patience is waiting without being anxious.
In our current society, we believe that we are busier than before.
Time poverty is a problem of perception.
It’s a myth that we are busier than 100 years ago much less than 2000 years ago.
We are working less than we were in 1960’s and 1980’s worldwide and have more leisure time than any other century.
Ever since time is introduced in 18th’s century in relation to money, people associate their value with time.
Once hours are quantified, people worry that time will be wasted, used, and saved.
When economies grow, valuable items become scarce.
The more valuable something is the more scarce it seems.
So people have come to believe that time is scarce and time should not be wasted.
We have for so long bought this illusion of time.
The slogan “time = money” justifies this illusion.
As long as you believe that you are wasting your life away, you cannot have peace of mind.
It has made us feel less happy and more impatient by the minute.
We become more anxious and create our own stresses.
Time is an illusion. You are not going anywhere. There is no need to rush.
Patience is an ability and an attitude.
You are always moving forward. There are ebbs and flows in life. There is a time for everything.
Let yourself flow with the universe.
Then you will achieve your goals and, still, have peace of mind.
6. Know Thyself
If we know what triggers us, we are likely to change our response to the situation.
As long we don’t know our habitual thoughts, we will be at the mercy of our subconscious destructive drives.
Your subconscious mind doesn’t know what is good for you, it just likes to do what it has always been doing – running the subconscious script.
Give yourself contemplation and reflect on your actions and its effects on others.
You will learn that because you are able to know how it affected you, you know that you have the ability to make a change.
Know yourself and you will be more at peace with any situation.
7. Anchor your peace with a time when you were peaceful
There is a time in your life when you were relaxed, calm, and peaceful.
Our memories have the ability to bring the feelings into the present.
If you were to think of a happy time in your life, your most joyful moment, you will inevitably smile a little bit more.
If you were to think of your worst days, it brings back those feelings to your present body.
Remember a specific time you were peaceful.
Notice the environment, what it smells like, what it looks like, and what it feels like to be there.
You are already there. Visualize it in your mind.
Certain memories anchor a specific feeling in your mind.
Recall that memory and you will bring to you a peaceful mind.
8. Take a Deep Breath
Having a slow rhythmic deep breathing allows you to change your state of consciousness through changing your breath.
The breath is intimately connected to the mind.
When your mind is racing, your breaths become shallow.
When your breath is slow and deep, your mind is relaxed.
If you want your mind to be relaxed, breathe deeply.
As you breathe deeply and consciously, you want to keep the rhythm of the pace flowing.
This will naturally occur when you do it for awhile.
Rhythm is how you will stay in that current state of consciousness.
If you get out of rhythm, then you change your state of consciousness.
9. Do what is important NOW
This is part of the “Live in the Present Moment” cliche, but it actually pays off.
A lot of what we do is for the future (future family, future rewards, future return, etc.), but we don’t focus on what we are doing right now.
Whenever you get yourself into thinking about the many possibilities of the future, you will tend to stress out the details.
You think of what ifs and all the scenarios of what could possibly happen.
You’ll plan years in advance and prepare all the necessary tools you think you need if it were to happen.
But as they say, “Man plan, God laughs”, you’ll soon find out that reality is 99% of the time very different from what we think happens.
None of the future thoughts is important because the future is unknowable.
This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t plan.
If you are thinking of going on a snow trip, a shopping spree, or creating career plan, then plan.
But if you plan out too far into the distant future, involving thousands of possibilities, then your mind will not be at ease.
You can plan for your future, but predicting the future you cannot.
The best way to predict the future is to create it yourself.
And to create the future, we focus on the present.
There is no future without the present.
So focus on the present moment and what is important to do right now.
Whenever you are in analysis paralysis, think of what you can do right this present moment.
10. Connect with Nature
Expose yourself to nature because nature replenishes you.
Indoors and electronics? Not so much.
This is why staying in the office, spending in front of the computer, or being indoor becomes so tiring.
Take a walk in the park, sit down with the trees and the birds, look out into the sea and stare into the night sky.
The energies of nature are all around us.
So connect with nature and you will have peace of mind.
Being Calm in a Stormy World
I have learned how to be calm and peaceful by observing the winds.
Wind is detached, graspless, flowing, and letting itself go wherever life leads them.
You are like the wind. Be the wind.